So what is going on right now? Does she want to break up? Do you? Do you need help splitting up or staying together? I'm not quite sure I understand how I can best offer advice and help to you.
Unless you can get her to go to counseling, one of you needs to start proceedings for either a legal separation or a divorce. I'm sorry.
And worse yet, now that I know how complicated the finances and assets are, I urge you to find a divorce (family law) attorney you like.
Some of them will give you a free consultation. Regardless, you can pay for a consultation with at least one of them, for an hour. That usually costs between $200 - $400. You will learn more in that hour than I can possibly tell you on Just Answer.
Meanwhile, if you have someone like a religious leader with whom you can talk, that's what they're there for. Make an appointment. Or if you'd rather find someone else, find a counselor. You're going to be going through a lot of pain and stress and it'll help to have someone hold your hand occassionally. I know things seem bleak now, but they will be better a year from now, I promise.
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