What gift should a non-custodial father send to his 17 year old daughter he has supported for years, when she graduated TOP OF HER CLASS of 500 in an academically acclaimed school? The father graduated top of his class of 700 and now his daughter, on her own, did the same in her class of similar size. She achieved a full scholarship to a top 100 university. This question asks what sentimental gift a father could give to his daughter in this momentous situation. Money IS an object, therefore reasonableness is relevant. Scratching my head as a parent. Can you make a good suggestion for an appropriate Graduation gift?
Hi, My name is XXXXX XXXXX X am your Etiquette Expert.Thanks for your great question and congratulations on such a fantastic achievement of you and your daughter. I can tell you are very proud and you have every right to be.You might consider one fo the following as appropriate gifts for this occasion:- A framed picture of just the two of you with a nice note attached and perhaps a short note handwritten on the front or back of the picture.- A pendant perhaps containing her birth stone- a bracelet again with her birth stone or a short message engraved.All of these would, be well received and have special meaning for your daughter. Also I checked a few places on line and there is a very big selection of the bracelets and pendants for about $50 which hopefully will fit your budget.The framed picture would be the least expensive and remember it is the thought that counts here not the price you pay for the gift.You may consider inviting her out for dinner and presenting the gift at the dinner.Good luck with this and if you have any related follow up questions please let me know.Once again - congratulations to you ad your daughter.
Thank you for the kind words and good suggestions. I should have added, however, that my daughter and I live 1500 miles apart and while I keep in active touch with her throughout each week via webcam, phone, and email, the child support I've had to pay (or go to jail) was miscalculated from Square One such that I send off 95% of what I make for her support, leaving me little left over to live on (I had to move in with other family to make ends meet.) Ergo, I've not been able to save the amount it would cost for plane fare, hotel, rental car, meals out etc., for even a weekend visit (about $1500) to her state so we've not had a picture together in person since 2004. Oh yeah! The child support authorities have no idea how they can destroy families this way but fortunately I've been able to compensate and stay as close to my daughter as possible via electronic means and even changed the laws in my state to make electronic visitation ("Virtual Visitation") an automatic addition to traditional in-person visitation schedules.So net net, the idea of a picture together or a dinner out doesn't work at present although I hope to rondezvous with her once she gets to college.What about flowers? If appropriate, what kind and color would be correct from father to daughter for graduation?She has also asked for money to assist with college expenses (although most have been provided for via scholarship and grant.) I will continue to support her financially but for her graduation, I'm more inclined to get her something commemorative (in addition to flowers) that she can hold on to and remember.
Hi, thanks for providing additional information that describes your situation.Flowers would be perfectly acceptable. There are also very good online card services available to you where you can design and send a custom card to your daughter for a very low price - many actually are free.Remember it is the thought that counts more than the cost of the gift so this is a practical matter.I am sure your daughter will appreciate the gift of flowers and you can do something else when you get a chance to be with her.
Could you be more specific with regard to flowers? For example, red roses usually connote romantic love and would probably not be appropriate from father to daughter. Pink roses might be more appropriate but is there such a thing as a "graduation flower" or color that is most commonly used? I could colors together in a bouquet that matched her school colors (blue and yellow) but she was not a cheerleader nor did she participate in sports such that school colors would be so meaningful in a personal expression of congratulations and praise.Her birthday is XXXXX 12, btw. If you happen to know the birth stone for that date, do share (or I can look it up myself). Flowers in that color of stone might make sense although I'd have to explain it in a card as the significance of the color in floral form might not make immediate sense. Jewelry would and yes, I am considering that as well.What about mums? I've purchased my share of mums for Homecoming dates when in high school years ago but would they apply for graduation?
Hi, it is customary to give a Hawaiian Lei in this situation with purple and yellow which may include orchids.The birthstone for July 12 th is Sapphire.Regarding the share of the homecoming dates - this depends on what the terms of the arrangement you entered into . Impossible for me to say. Regardless a conversation with the mother would be appropriate to find a mutually acceptable solution that is in the best interests of your daughter.
You are saying I need to consult with my ex-wife to determine the appropriate flowers to send my daughter for her graduation? Why? Do you assume that only mothers know these things and fathers are incapable of picking out appropriate flowers? I think you have a very distasteful anti-male / anti-father orientation when you, as an etiquette expert, cannot even advise what an appropriate flower for a particular event would be and you defer to another female who you assert would know better than you as a supposed expert in these matters or me as the child's father.No value added you are.I request another etiquette expert who does not have an anti-male bias, please.
And furthermore, the idea of giving a Hawaiian lei makes no sense unless I am there in person to put it over her head -- and I am not, as I live in another state. Whoever gets a Hawaiian lei delivered to their door in a box? That's just plain weird. Where did you come up with this supposedly "traditional" graduation floral idea? She live in Illinois, fer cryin' out loud, not Honolulu. We are not impressed.
I will opt out of this question. Good luck.
-- Hello and let's try this again from the beginning ok? Your idea about birthstone color and flowers is excellent. The actual birthstone for July is Ruby (Sapphire is for Sept) - so you luck out with deep red roses being her birthstone color.AND there is nothing more lasting and memorable, something to pass down in her family to come than a meaningful piece of jewelry. A ruby ring, a ruby necklace? I'd probably opt for the necklace since ring sizes can vary and be tricky to get right without her there - but a pendant can hang from nearly any chain and be completely different through the years depending on what it's on. It won't be cheap. I could tell you a 'created ruby' is just as nice and will last as long, but honestly for something that will last a lifetime and hopefully be the start of a tradition that will tell your story and your daughter's story long after you are gone - well, make it real, right? There are ruby cabochons which are opaque type rubies that are often more reasonable in price than the gemstone, sparkly, transparent stones - and both are gorgeous. I think you'll actually have some fun shopping for it, no matter which type you decide on. Keep an open mind about it and let it pick you. By looking through all the options out there you'll just know when you have the one that will be that 'medal of honor' for your daughter and for the future.
Formal event coordinator/officiate, announcement author