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What is the correct etiquette, when there is a party for someone

 

Customer Question

What is the correct etiquette, when there is a party for someone other than the tenants of the home. The home was used by a family member for a birthday party for her mom and there is, let's say 10 unopened cases of beer and 1/2 case of wine? Who gets to keep the unopened items? The tenants or the one the party was given for? One of my pet peves. What is the correct etiquette?

 



Already Tried:
Sent a text (because they never answer the phone) and said I would be picking up some of the beer. I left the wine, no problem. Answer "BEER STAYS" lol & I bought 2 cases so just take what your friend brought. Mind you there were about 10 cases/30 packs. It's not the beer its the principal.

Submitted: 463 days and 17 hours ago.
Category: Etiquette
Value: $16
Status: CLOSED

Accepted Answer

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Expert:  sheilaetiquette replied 463 days and 16 hours ago.

Hi, My name is XXXXX XXXXX X am your Etiquette Expert.

Thanks very much for your question. The correct etiquette is that the person that hosts the party and presumably arranged (paid for) the food and drinks would be assumed to want any remaining food and beverage items after the event. Further it is normal when the event is being held like the one you describe for the host to proactively tell the tenants to help themselves to some (or all) of the remaining items. It is also normal for guests who bring items not to take them when they leave if they are unopened.

In this case it does not seem that the host proactively communicated their intent vista via the remaining items and you have taken some items. For the remaining items I would store them somewhere as the onus is on the host to come and get them. If other tenants take them so be it.

Good luck with this!

Expert TypeEtiquette Coach
Category: Etiquette
Pos. Feedback: 100.0 %
Accepts: 74
Answered: 1/28/2012

Experience: Certified Etiquette Trainer.

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Customer replied 463 days and 15 hours ago.

It was my daughter who hosted the party for me at my sisters house. My sister was gracious to let my daughter have my surprise party there. Which is very much appreciated. Thank you for your answer it is what I would have thought. If there is more than a few I think my sister is more than welcome to it. I just think she should have asked if the host (my daughter) was going to take any before she was asked. My daughter would never have asked.

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Expert:  sheilaetiquette replied 369 days and 15 hours ago.

Thanks so much for giving me the opportunity to answer your question. If you have any additional questions I'd be honored to answer them for you.

To request me put "For SheilaEtiquette" at the beginning of your question.

Respectfully, Sheila

Sheila Keast. Certified Etiquette Trainer.
Etiquette For The Real World.

 
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