I've paid special attention to dreams about the deceased for 5 years on this site, and have 55 years experience dealing with dreams, over 40 of them professionally. I approach dreams by looking for the DIFFERENCES between the dreamer's waking knowledge about the subject of the dream and the dream's content. And it's important to guess at what could have triggered the dream: What recent event(s) or thought(s) and feeling(s) could have something to do with the focus of your dreams? Could this be an anniversary of some importance vis-a-vis one of your parents or yourself and one or both of them?
As a First Approximation, that focus is something belonging to either you or one of your parents that has gone missing or is held by the wrong person--you instead of your parent or vice versa. But it's quite possible that this something that is not present and accounted for is not a tangible object but an internal possession, like a personality characteristic or an important memory.
Your mother's possession of the receipt for something belonging to you, actually could relate to the common phenomenon that a daughter learns much of her thought, emotion and behavior patterns by unconscious imitation of her mother's ways. So metaphorically, your mother may have "paid for" one or more personality characteristics that she knows are significant in your character.
Your father's collections are different: They're NOT invisible and not intrinsic to his personality, but more like accumulations of repetitious collections from the timeline of his life experiences--habitual interests external to himself instead of action, thinking or feeling habits that your mother acquired by effortful living ("Paid for")
But what's more acutely important is WHY NOW? for these two dreams? Are you suddenly bumping into habits, behaviors, significant decisions, goals or achievements that remind you of both parents' ways of life? (We are all more like our parents than we normally notice.
I'd like to find out what you think about these questions before going deeper into the interpretation of your dream.
What are the most surprising or shocking moment's in each of your dreams? (How real they seem is probably one, and it's significant.
Hi, Dr. Brown, I really like your answers. This is my first time I asked a question about dreams. I don't believe those supernatural stuff, and afraid if I'd get that kind of answer. Your answer seems all from science, that's what I like.
To give you more details: My grandpa passed away on July 17th 36 years ago. He lived with us before I was born and till he left us. My first dream was actually happened the same night when I went to sleep on 7/17, and before got up for that sleep. I was unconscious about it. Thank you for remind me to think about anniversaries. My grandpa was the first loved one who passed away in my life. Therefore his death was the most significant event for me.
I actually had another dream 36 years ago, 3 days before my grandpa passed away. The dream was very simple, just a telegraph in front of my eyes. It says "Grandpa passed away on the 3rd." In the language I was using at the time, "3-days" and "the 3rd day" of the month are the same on telegraph, and there were no tense difference in the language. I immediately woke up. It was still dark (2~3am), but I couldn't sleep and thought that it must be my parents didn't want to disturb my feeling as I was not home (planning to be home that day, July 14th). I thought that they were trying to hide the news from me. That whole day I was very sad and hoped that my dream was not true.
I got home that late afternoon. On the street, I first saw my sister, and asked her "where is grandpa?" "In the hospital. What happened?" "Oh, nothing." The next morning I went to the hospital to see my grandpa. I was so glad that the dream was not true.
However, probably exactly 72 hours from my dream, my grandpa passed away. I then realized that "the 3rd" on the telegraph in my dream actually meant "in 3 days." I hated myself why didn't understand this earlier so I could be at grandpa's bedside .... for next some 20~30 years, I dreamed my grandpa, later added grandma, on or around July 17th almost every year without consciously thinking about them, nor noticing about the calendar.
Yes, my grandparents and my parents are the four people influenced my life significantly. They made me as today's me. One day I was driving home in an evening after a very busy day. I suddenly thought about my dad, and started to cry in the car. I couldn't stop my tears ... when I arrived home, I realized that was the day that my dad passed away for 5 years.
Why did I know these without consciously thinking about them. How could I such accurately"predict" when my grandpa would leave us. Yes I knew he was in hospital for a long time (more than 6 months), I knew the situation wasn't nice. But why the telegraph didn't say 2 days or 4 days?
Another thing about my parents. I have been thinking to put together of my family history for my children to know where their ancestors came from, what did they do, what kind of people they were. Thought about it for a couple of years. A few months ago, I finally started to put it in action. When organizing the info together, I'd often put some mental notes: need to ask mom about this, and ask dad about that ... only to find out that I had no way to ask them any more. Recently this work is slowing down or I'd say almost stopped, as I have a lot of other things occupied my time. Don't know if the dreams are the reminders for me to continue doing it.
There seemed not much surprising or shocking moments in the dreams except when the young lady took the box away. They both seemed very real, I even felt that I touched they and felt their skin. They were as real as even after I woke up, I thought I was still with them.
I don't know why now for the two dreams. That's what I wanted to find out. I'm not suddenly bumping into something. In fact, I have dreamed my parents and grandparents many many times. The differences this time: 1) two days in a row I had my both parents came to my dreams, I don't remember it ever happened before; 2) it was on the date of my grandpa passed away (I didn't know when I asked the question, but after your reminder, I realized); 3) these dreams felt very "real". They were so clearly and vividly remembered after I woke up.
It's too late for me to think in depth about your dreams tonight. But I will get to let your responses percolate in my own dreaming mind. But YOU've already discovered the WHY NOW answer. And also the shocking theft of your father's collection-box may reflect your unconscious realization that this preservation of your own collections of meaningful data about your ancestors means more to you than you were noticing as you let your prior focus slide away. You mention that your childhood language was not English (what was it?)
In traditional-culture (eg Chinese) style you experience visitations-as-remembrance & reminders on your anniversaries. And your grandfather seems to stand in for your father. How does that work in your inner life?
And what did you see and experience & expect-or-think about the young lady who took the box away? Everything about her could lead us deeper into the message(s) this dream has to give to you. This is important, because your basic structure in this dream is to re-present a re-connection with your vital ancestry, which is NOT surprising but familiar, yet paranormal enough to attract your attention to the aspects of your dream that are DIFFERENT than your waking awareness of how you treasure and honor your parents and grandparents.
So let's keep delving a little deeper into your dream by exploring the unique features in these two dreams compared to your "normal" visits with parents.
PS. Thank you for respecting my careful scientific-observer approach to your dream. I studied Freud's dream interpretation at 18, phenomenology in German grad school and at Stanford (first PhD 20-26), Gestalt shortly after,, and Jungian & phenomenological dream analysis after marrying my Jungian wife at 42, just over 30 years ago. I neither assume nor scoff at "paranormal" manifestations, because I've seen too many of them, but include them in the overall meaning and purpose of the dreams.
I will comment more tomorrow--but I just remembered that the JA management will NOT transmit anything else I send you unless you give me some response first. So please respond so that we can continue. OR I could offer you "Premium Service" and then we could gain access to private Skype or email or telephone contact methods and continue on our own, without our conversation being visible to anyone else. I will "Offer Premium Service" now for a modest fee, but YOU DON'T need to agree or pay to continue our conference. Just writing any response is enough for our first week. The only difference is being confidential for an additional fee or being visible to anyone who is a "qualified expert" or management and wants to read.
I was on a trip when your answer was posted on July 22. You actually could give me more comments without a response from me. I once had the expert sent me 5 or 6 messages within one day before I could get back to him. JA had all messages delivered to me. Also, I am OK for reading your comments on this platform. Please go ahead. Thanks!
I'll get back to you later today, as soon as I have time. Thanks for responding, no problem with not doing Skype etc.
I have been waiting for the response since Friday morning, as you said that you'd get back to me that day. Now more than two days passed, is it possible that you answer my previous questions by Monday or Tuesday morning?