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Ask Dr. Norman Brown Your Own Question

Dr. Norman Brown
Dr. Norman Brown, PhD
Category: Dream Interpretation
Satisfied Customers: 1189
Experience:  40yrs interpreting dreams & connecting conscious & unconscious minds
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So I've been having dreams about this one person of the opposite

Customer Question

So I've been having dreams about this one person of the opposite sex for about a year, the first one was about a month before I saw her, and the most recent one she wasn't to interested
Submitted: 11 months ago.
Category: Dream Interpretation
Expert:  Dr. Norman Brown replied 11 months ago.
I need to know more details about your dreams about this person before I can determine which level(s) of meaning are most valuable. Did you dream about her the first time days or weeks before you EVER met her? How do the dream(s) you remember compare and contrast with what you have experienced, done and felt when you have actually been together with her? I'm trying to determine to what extent she has been a real relationship vs a symbolic figure referring to an inner reality for yourself. That's why I need to be able to compare your realistic experience(s) of her with your dream(s)' experience of her. So please clarify that as much as you can.
Customer: replied 11 months ago.
Ok well my first dream about a month or two before we met, in my dream it was a skinny blonde, at this specifific location, and I met her at the same location in person a couple months after, I had dreams that we ended up dating, we worked the same job in my dream, which is where we met, she moved away and the dreams about this person continued, the most recent one I was trying to talk to her and she didn't seem interested, so I walked away and saw my ex with another guy and I punched the guy
Customer: replied 11 months ago.
Before I saw my ex me and the other girl walked into a hotel room, than I walked out and saw that
Expert:  Dr. Norman Brown replied 11 months ago.
It's not clear to me how much of your dreams came true beside the meeting itself, and perhaps working at the same job. The precognitive dream in advance does happen to come people, though not often. If she was your first new-love-hope after your breakup with your ex, I'd GUESS it was a nudge to show you that you would be able to love again. And her later unwillingness to talk to you was evidence that just because you could love HER didn't guarantee that she would love YOU in return. She might not have been ready to love anybody yet. In fact it might be so that you weren't ready to love anybody yet either, since you were still consumed with anger towards the new guy your exGF had latched onto. There's no guarantee in psychic phenomena that you'll be certain to succeed with someone you dream about. (Something like that happened to me when I was 30: dreamt the girl in detail about 12 hours before I met her; fell in love with her & she liked me too; but she was still attached to a guy back in her home town, so wasn't on the same page. It had been about 18 months since the first great love of my life (8 years), and the dream showed me that I could love again, and could be inspired by love. Primitive emotions like punching show you're stripped down to your impulses. Would that be normal for you in waking life?
Expert:  Dr. Norman Brown replied 11 months ago.
Was this skinny blonde something like your ideal type of girl?
Customer: replied 11 months ago.
the only part of my dreams that came true were the meating part, nothing else,we never got to work together often just met a couple of times, I found out she moved back to my state about an hour away, that's when the dreams about this person came back around the same time, I was with my ex at that time so that makes sense, but no that wouldn't be normal for me to just punch someone, and yes she is definitely my ideal girl.
Customer: replied 11 months ago.
Are my dreams telling me to reach out and let go of my ex?
Expert:  Dr. Norman Brown replied 11 months ago.
Your idea girl is an inner, spiritual figure, representing the idealized feminine aspect of your own personality, as your most creative "muse." If my understanding of your timing with your ex and this precognitive dream is accurate--then this precognitive dream is bringing you a very important (and unusual) spiritual message: that if you stop trying to hold onto your ex as an earthly/human partner (with whom your relationship has already run aground) then you'll be able to turn your erotic energy inward towards creating a new version of yourself (with the collaboration of your "soulmate image" who represents your own creativity. I wonder if you were in SOME way "working with her" for some time when you had those "working together" dreams?Then there's that last dream--which might then suggest that your dream-ego (as a representative of your waking personality in a not-very-flattering perspective from "higher-wisdom" (aka "God's-eye view") lowered his aspirations down to a one-night- stand in a hotel, with the immediate consequence that your "anima" (see Jungian Anima in Wikipedia) promptly deserted you and your dream-ego tried to go BACKWARDS to your exGF and lowered himself to punching any guy who'd bar your way backwards.By the way, how did That guy differ from any generic guy who could have played that role? For whatever's unusual or outstanding about him--any details at all+what they imply to you-- could mean something about what the dream's wise directer is revealing about your urge to return to your past attachment.So I think your dreams are telling you to let go of your ex, but also to reach IN to the beauty and creativity within yourself, NOT to reach out for another girlfriend to replace her. The fact that the "girl of your dreams" did actually appear in real life was not an indication that you should keep chasing after her, but instead that if you unite and create with inner parts of yourself instead of only looking for love in girls around you, you will not need to be angry about your ex anymore--and you can transform yourself through creative activities--since it is normal for us humans to go thru a whole series of personality transformations in the direction of what we are meant to become. And those transformations will also change the nature of the people we attract into our lives and the ways that we develop to love them. Please ask any questions you may have about this (perhaps unusual) way of viewing your dreams.
Customer: replied 11 months ago.
Ok that makes sense, buy what do you mean when you say we could have been working together when I had the dreams?
And about the guy that I punched, the only thing I remember was that it was an old man that was out of shape and bald on top
Customer: replied 11 months ago.
Maybe because my ex is also a lot older than me
Customer: replied 11 months ago.
I asked about the reaching out part because I found it strange that I had dreams of her again and I found out that she moved back, but reaching inward does male sense
Expert:  Dr. Norman Brown replied 11 months ago.
First question: I'm suggesting that the more important meaning of the imaginary new GF in your dream is that she is the creative-feminine side of yourself, which is NOT confused with your fleshly love-interest when you DON'T have such a relationship. So you've had some dreams since the first meeting of working together with her (which is contrary to the facts of your waking life, and therefore a symbolic message)--and that could mean that you've had a chance to do some "inner work" or artistic creative work that fosters expansion & transformation of your own personality. C. G. Jung used the tradition of medieval Alchemy to symbolize this sort of psychological personality development: Two alchemists, a man and a woman, would do meditations and chemical experiments together aimed at metaphorically changing lead into gold. Both Your obvious erotic energy and your idealization of the unknown woman support the interpretation that this is your transformative female/creative alterego you're uniting with.Does the old man out of shape remind hyou of anyone? And how is his likely personality (just imagine it)DIFFERENT from yours?"

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