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Hi this is Dr. Hill. End of life decisions are one of the most difficult to make. Your bond with Leia is apparent and I know that you want what is best for her. If she is eating, drinking, and otherwise comfortable, then you are right not to give into pressure to euthanize her. I believe that you will know when it is time. Trust your heart.
Is it a possibility for you to have a pet sitter come in mid day to put her in her wheelchair and take her out. That way there is no pressure on your wife and you are able to work without feeling guilty. Many veterinary hospitals have a technician or two that does house calls for hospice care. In my area, there are full time animal care providers. What Leia needs is hospice care to make her remaining time more comfortable. Please let me know if you have any further questions. Take care.