Making false allegations of child sexual abuse is VERY serious. In fact, if your daughter's ex files a police report
that alleges that your daughter's boyfriend has sexually abused one or both of your granddaughters, he can be prosecuted for filing a false police report.
Also, if such allegations were made, there are expert child interviewers who would speak to your grandchildren in a child friendly environment. There are very strict guidelines that the expert interviewers must follow. The children would be asked VERY open ended questions about what goes on in their home, if they like your daughter's boyfriend, and if not, why not, etc. Children will usually open up to the interviewer if something DID happen to them. If the children indicate that nothing happened, then the interviewer will report that information to the police. At that point, the police may close any potential case.
Also, if the allegations are severe, the children may have to be examined by a pediatrician who knows how to do sexual abuse exams on children. If the children had to be examined, the physician would report whether or not there was any physical evidence of abuse.
Your daughter's ex may also try to modify or change custody of the children. However, child custody order will not be modified in Florida unless a parent or a third party can show a substantial, material, or unanticipated change in circumstances. The modification must serve the child's best interests.
If your daughter's ex were to make such allegations and ask for a change of custody and the allegations are proven to be false, your daughter may be able to recover any reasonable attorney fees for having to defend against such false allegations. Moreover, the court will be less likely to EVER believe your daughter's ex if he were to bring any other motions to modify or change custody.
There is really nothing that you can do to prepare against your ex son in law making allegations of sexual abuse. However, if your daughter has been seeing her boyfriend for a long time and nothing has happened with the children or her ex hasn't made any allegations yet, it's important that she and/or the children don't give the father any reason to make such unfounded complaints
. More on this later in the answer.
Your ex son in law may not like your daughter moving on with another man. And, sometimes, the courts still don't like relationships where the parties aren't married. If your ex son in law tries to modify/change custody because the boyfriend is living in the household without being married, your daughter can always indicate that she is engaged to be married. Sometimes, that helps. But, more and more, people are living together without being married.
You and your daughter MUST be VERY careful to not share your concerns about possible sexual abuse allegations by their father. If you do, it may get back to their father and give him an idea! So, be VERY CAREFUL not to discuss your concerns in the children's' presence.
Your daughter should just keep being a good mother. That's the best defense against any unfounded allegations. I'm sure that she protects her children and has taught them that if ANYONE (including her boyfriend) touches them in a way that makes them uncomfortable, they should tell her.
I hope you find this information useful.
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