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Going by your description a cylinder head failure has occured.
The reason that I say head failure is that normally a head gasket will not allow coolant into the engine oil
Okay, how do I fix it
What I would ask you to do is once the engine cools down, remove the radiator cap to check the coolant level. If the level is low attempt to start the engine with the cap off.
Do not stand over the radiator as it is cranked. Often times coolant will come shooting out
I can do that. What do I look for?
Look for coolant shooting out or puffs of smoke coming from the inside of the radiator
And if thats the case, what happens next?
The engine will need to be disassemblied to find the cause of the failure. Depending on how hot the engine got, it is possible to have cracked a cylinder head or the block itself
Ouch! Sounds like it might be easier to replace the engine?
It may very well be. The problem is often finding a good used unit. Please try to verify the engine condition first but it really doesnt sound good
I'm not happy with your answers but at least you were honest and didn't sugarcoat it. Thank you