Ok well if you have keyless entry this relay is located in a different area. You will need to look under the left hand side of the dash. Like I said, there will be three yellow wires and on yellow with black stripe. The testing is the same, but the placement is different. Sorry I do not have any illustrations of actual placement of this item. Here is a wiring schematic of the relay so that you can better understand why we need to find this.
The pcm is located under the left hand side of the dash.
The transmission safety switch is located on the right rear of the transmission.
We need to concentrate on the two purple wires at the switch. These should both have voltage with the key in the start position. Let me know how you make out!
Well if all of the yellow leads were energized, the relay is working as it should.
See the terminal A2 at the starter relay actually sends voltage to the transmission safety switch. I would advise you to start lookign through that wiring. The relay runs to terminal F8 of the under hood electrical center and then back out to the transmission safety switch from terminal A8. These points should all be energized with the key in the on position.
Well if one of them is not getting voltage, I would check to see if the yellow with black stripe is a good ground. If not this can be security related. This is very important to know. The wiring from the relay runs to the underhood electrical center and then back out to the transmission safety switch. Here is the complete wiring schematic so that you can see how this is wired.