Hello and welcome to JustAnswer.
I'm sorry to hear about your situation and hope I can help.
Unfortunately, any money that is left unspent in a flexible spending account reverts to the employer.
If your employer agrees that it was responsible for failing to advise you (which the benefit administrator did) about the details of the plan, including the knowledge that your daughter was too old to be eligible for it, then your employer would be the one responsible for refunding the amount left to you less taxes.
It would of course be helpful if you have a written or otherwise recorded record of the benefits administrator's assurance that you would only have to pay taxes on the money left in your flexible spending account.
However, unfortunately, there is nothing in the law that actually requires an employer to give money left in a flexible spending account back to the employee, and most employers keep the money to pay the benefit administrators for setting up the accounts.
For more information regarding the 'use it or lose it' rule that cafeteria plans are subject to (a flesible spending account is one of those) see here:http://www.trion.com/services/section-125-plans/
I sincerely XXXXX XXXXX had better news to give you, and wholeheartedly agree that it is incredibly unfair for you not to be reimbursed for your payroll deductions, but I hope you appreciate a direct and honest answer to your question.
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